I am having a party – maybe. That is I am decorating, cleaning my house, preparing food and beverage, but I have no idea whether anyone will show up or how much food and beverage to prepare. When did “maybe” become an officially acceptable reply to attend an event in someone’s home? I was raised in the era of “yes” or “no,” which wasn’t all that very long ago. The only other acceptable answer back in the day was, “Yes, but I will be late,” which had to be cleared with the host of the party long before the day of the event. Of course, I blame technology and Tupperware.

First came Tupperware, the “party” that forces unsuspecting friends to purchase something they don’t want or need from the host. This idea has since expanded from Longaberger baskets to custom-made clothing. It used to be obvious that you would have to shell out. Now you just might arrive and discover you have to buy candles in order to leave lest your friend think you unsupportive of her hard work – meaning opening a bottle of wine, a bag of chips and salsa as well as going to the trouble to invite you. Even though I have never hosted one of these “parties,” their very existence make friends wary when you invite them to anything.

Technology legitimized “maybe.” It is an official option on Facebook as well as evite. “Maybe” is the equivalent to all the kids get trophies now because we don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings. Saying that you will not attend my party, does not hurt my feelings. I recognize that you have a life and other obligations. Just tell me, “No.” Depending on who you are, that could save me a lot of money on alcohol or another hour of cooking just to make something that fits within your crazily narrow dietary parameters that I seem to feel the need to accommodate because I consider you a friend, albeit not a good enough friend to have the courtesy to tell me whether you are or are not attending my party.